quite often i get to thinkin how as kids we got by
like at christmas time at our place we couldnt even afford a fire
but we made due with what we had then when i was young
dad used to suck a peppermint and we'd sit around his tongue
we couldnt afford no sparkly tinsel for our christmas tree
so wed just wheel our grandad in and make the old c*** sneeze
(wheel him around the other side nana)
thing change pretty b***** quick
ive got kids now of my own
and i heard then unwrap their pressies
last night when i got home
Hey Santa claus you c***!
Where's me f****** bike?
I've unwrapped all this other junk and there's nothing that I like.
I wrote you a f****** letter and I come to see you twice
Ya worn out geriatric fart, you forgot me f****** bike.
If I wanted a pair of b***** thongs, I'd have b***** asked.
And this cowboy suit and ping pong set you can shove right up your a***!
You've stuffed me b***** order up
It's enough to make you spew
And I'm not the only one who's snakey
Me sisters dirty too!
(female voice)
Hey santa clause you c***!
Where's me f****** pram?
You promised me you'd bring me one, you remember who I am.
'Cause I'm the little girl who you made sit right on your hand
I'll give you f****** ho ho ho
You forgot me f****** pram
(male voice)
Next time I come to see ya, I'm gonna punch you in the guts
And I'll let your f****** reihndeer loose and kick Rudolf in the nuts!
You just wait 'till next year, when you go to that store
And me and me little sister, come stomping through the door
And we'll say, yeah you wait for it
Hey mums and dads you smell his breath and check his bloodshot eyes
And don't listen to him boys and girls 'cause he tells f****** lies
He's just a p*** tank and a pervert, and he's not even very bright
'Cause the old f****** w***** Forgot me f****** bike.
You wait you old c***, I'm gonna dob you in
Tell me old man on you, he's gonna punch your f****** lights out
'I saw mummy sucking santa clause'
like at christmas time at our place we couldnt even afford a fire
but we made due with what we had then when i was young
dad used to suck a peppermint and we'd sit around his tongue
we couldnt afford no sparkly tinsel for our christmas tree
so wed just wheel our grandad in and make the old c*** sneeze
(wheel him around the other side nana)
thing change pretty b***** quick
ive got kids now of my own
and i heard then unwrap their pressies
last night when i got home
Hey Santa claus you c***!
Where's me f****** bike?
I've unwrapped all this other junk and there's nothing that I like.
I wrote you a f****** letter and I come to see you twice
Ya worn out geriatric fart, you forgot me f****** bike.
If I wanted a pair of b***** thongs, I'd have b***** asked.
And this cowboy suit and ping pong set you can shove right up your a***!
You've stuffed me b***** order up
It's enough to make you spew
And I'm not the only one who's snakey
Me sisters dirty too!
(female voice)
Hey santa clause you c***!
Where's me f****** pram?
You promised me you'd bring me one, you remember who I am.
'Cause I'm the little girl who you made sit right on your hand
I'll give you f****** ho ho ho
You forgot me f****** pram
(male voice)
Next time I come to see ya, I'm gonna punch you in the guts
And I'll let your f****** reihndeer loose and kick Rudolf in the nuts!
You just wait 'till next year, when you go to that store
And me and me little sister, come stomping through the door
And we'll say, yeah you wait for it
Hey mums and dads you smell his breath and check his bloodshot eyes
And don't listen to him boys and girls 'cause he tells f****** lies
He's just a p*** tank and a pervert, and he's not even very bright
'Cause the old f****** w***** Forgot me f****** bike.
You wait you old c***, I'm gonna dob you in
Tell me old man on you, he's gonna punch your f****** lights out
'I saw mummy sucking santa clause'