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The Featherbrain Championship Lyrics

you could se a blue was brewing as they eyed each other off
and the tension only mounted when snakey won the toss
"you break"he said to lofty as he chucked across the cue
and the tension in the pub just grew and grew
"ill break allright" said lofty as he snapped the cue in half, flung it back at snake and said "here shove this up your a***"
"me Nana give me that" said snakey "mate yaw f***** gone"
and the feather brain championship was on.
it was the front-bar- featherbrain, non t**le fight, two bloke the size of buffaloes, big but not too bright and no one gave two k***s of goatshit who was wrong or right but the front-bar-featherbrain, non t**le fight.

no one seemed to know too much about their pedigree, in that sort of place you didn't ask them sort of things, they say lofty's from the top end he was ugly, tough and mean, used a welders wire brush to scrub his teeth.
And snake was just plain ugly where he came from no one knew, reckon Rambo would have s*** himself if snakey told him to
and together they weighed half a ton in singlet shorts and thongs, there was no c*** home but all the lights were on.

the breeze near knocked me over when snake threw the opening punch.
it seemed to come from nowhere i just heard this sickening crunch, Ithought if any b****** lives through that they're pretty f***** good, was like a railway peddlers hammer splitting wood.

it slammed lofty against the eightball table,flipped it on it's edge but he just casually got up walked around then ripped off all the legs, then one by one he smashed the c**** cross snakeys ugly head, if brain weren't so well padded he'd be dead.

but snake just shook his skull,blinked abit, and slowly looked around then chucked a right that would have knocked the war memorial down and the force of it sent lofty flying, crashing through the wall, now theres a doorway where there wern't one there befor.

he landed a*** up in the s***house, with his feet up in the air with bricks and s*** and broken glass and paper every where, n caked in that and c*** he ripped the dunny off the wall and armed with that and f****ll brains, went back for more.

He slammed that dunny over snakeys head shatterin it to bits, pepperin him with porcelin and splatterin hom with s***, and there were teeth amongst the muck and s***, whos they were you couldn't tell, but it looked like lofty lost an ear as well.and snakes right eye was swollen shut from where he'd copped one hard, fair d***um mate it looked as black as ernie dingo's a***. But with all the pieces missing and with all the blood and gore, they wern't as f***** ugly as before.
there was flesh and hair and skin and bone and blood splashed on the walls and them two b******s wallowing in it rollin cross the floor, and the publican just scratched his b****, wonderin, lookin round, should he clean the b****** up or burn it down?

most blues you see turn out to be a win or loss or draw, but f***** if ive seen both opponents lose a fight before
and I heard snakey say to lofty as they crawled towards the bar "f*** the snooker, wanna game of darts?"

it was the front-bar- featherbrain, non t**le fight, two bloke the size of buffaloes, big but not too bright and no one gave two k***s of goatshit who was wrong or right but the front-bar-featherbrain, non t**le fight.

it was the front-bar- featherbrain, non t**le fight, two bloke the size of buffaloes, big but not too bright and no one gave two k***s of goatshit who was wrong or right but the front-bar-featherbrain, non t**le fight.

it was the front-bar- featherbrain, non t**le fight, two bloke the size of buffaloes, big but not too bright and no one gave two k***s of goatshit who was wrong or right but the front-bar-featherbrain, non t**le fight.
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