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Diarrhea Lyrics

1. I KNOW IT'S GETTING LATE
AND I KNOW WE HAD A DATE LUCIA
I HATE TO MAKE YOU WAIT
CAUSE IT WOULD BE SO GREAT TO SEE YA
TEARS FALL FROM MY EYES
AND I MUST APOLOGIZE LUCIA
ILL HAVE TO STAY AT HOME
SO I CALLED YOU ON THE PHONE
CAUSE I'M STUCK HERE ON THE THRONE
WITH DIARRHEA
I THOUGHT IT WAS ONLY GAS
SO I WENT AND LET ONE PASS
THEN I STOOD THERE IN A TRANCE
AS I FILLED MY BRAND NEW PANTS
2. MY MOTHER BROUGHT ME SOUP
BUT IT ONLY MADE ME p*** LUCIA
I NEVER SHOULD HAVE ATE
BUT IT SOUNDED LIKE A GREAT IDEA
YOU KNOW IT REALLY HURTS
WHEN YOU GOT THE HERSHEY SQUIRTS LUCIA
THERE'S NO PAPER TO BE SEEN
SO I USED PEOPLE MAGAZINE
AND IT MAKES ME WANNA SCREAM
DIARRHEA
I LOVE YOU DEAR WITH ALL MY HEART
BUT I CAN'T GO OUT WITH LIQUID FARTS
I WOULDN'T HAVE TO BREAK OUR DATE
IF ONLY I COULD CONSTIPATE
3. I KNOW YOU GOT THE HOTS
BUT I REALLY GOT THE TROTS LUCIA
THERE'S NO NEED TO SCREAM AND SHOUT
CAUSE TOMORROW WE'LL GO OUT I GUARANTEE YA
I KNOW YOU NEED YOUR MAN
SO I CAME UP WITH A PLAN LUCIA
ILL TAKE A CORK AND SUPER GLUE
POUND IT IN THERE WITH MY SHOE
AND THEN ILL BE ALL THROUGH
WITH DIARRHEA
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For Diehards Only (1992)
Second Week of Deer Camp Second Week of Deer Camp (Part 2) Beer Run Deer Hunter's Widow Garage Sale My Car Won't Go Rusty Chevrolet Bingo Fever Fishing Wit Fred Fish Fight Song Cow Pie Song Three Months Late Talk Time Da Couch Dat Burps Ruthie Rollover Two Chicquitos Chicquito War Smelting U.S.A. A Dog Named Zippo Diarrhea Beer Gut Nightmare in My Bathroom