(ho ho ho!)
Hey grandpa, lets tell them the little story about this Christams
(yeah tell em, tell em about Christmas!)
Christmas Eve,
I didn't get much sleep
I kept hearing things
Heavy breathing from the chimney, who could it be?
(i know who it was)
(what happend then ben?)
(yeah what happend?)
I went back to sleep
(back to sleep? s***!)
I'm tired if I don't have sleep
And in the morn'
I couldn't believe my eyes
A whale of a corpse
With a long white beard was hangin over the fire
Oh Santa's he's a big fat f***
Went down the chimney got his fat a** suck
Oh honey call the lawyers fast
'cause Mrs. Claus is gonna sue my a**
Hey hey hey (hey!) yeah
(Ohh, oh oh)
OK grandpa, step up. Sing in this thing right here,
Tell them what you saw, tell them what you saw grandpa...
I gotta tell you folks
He wasn't wearin' no clothes (no clothes!)
He must have rubbed the whole gallon of crisco off
From his back and down to his toes
Well I was talking to the cops outside
The dog was lickin' crisco off of his thighs
They hauled him away in a double wide
What a sad, sad way to die, hey hey hey!
Santa's he's a big fat f***
Went down the chimney got his fat a** suck
Oh honey call the lawyers fast
Mrs. Claus is gonna sue our a**
Hey grandpa, lets tell them the little story about this Christams
(yeah tell em, tell em about Christmas!)
Christmas Eve,
I didn't get much sleep
I kept hearing things
Heavy breathing from the chimney, who could it be?
(i know who it was)
(what happend then ben?)
(yeah what happend?)
I went back to sleep
(back to sleep? s***!)
I'm tired if I don't have sleep
And in the morn'
I couldn't believe my eyes
A whale of a corpse
With a long white beard was hangin over the fire
Oh Santa's he's a big fat f***
Went down the chimney got his fat a** suck
Oh honey call the lawyers fast
'cause Mrs. Claus is gonna sue my a**
Hey hey hey (hey!) yeah
(Ohh, oh oh)
OK grandpa, step up. Sing in this thing right here,
Tell them what you saw, tell them what you saw grandpa...
I gotta tell you folks
He wasn't wearin' no clothes (no clothes!)
He must have rubbed the whole gallon of crisco off
From his back and down to his toes
Well I was talking to the cops outside
The dog was lickin' crisco off of his thighs
They hauled him away in a double wide
What a sad, sad way to die, hey hey hey!
Santa's he's a big fat f***
Went down the chimney got his fat a** suck
Oh honey call the lawyers fast
Mrs. Claus is gonna sue our a**