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Don't Call Them Twinkies Lyrics

In 1965 I wasn't quite alive yet, but I'm told they gave the MVP to Zoilo Versalles. Oliva hit the singles and Harmon hit the homers. Mudcat Grant won 20 games and they didn't play in a dome yet. The Dodgers came to Bloomington to play for the World Series. The Twins took the first two -- you can even ask Vin Scully. But Sandy Koufax proved to be a bit too much to crack, and the Twins went down in seven but they vowed that they'd be back.

From Nicollet to Hennepin, from St. Paul to St. Cloud, the Minnesota Twins are making Minnesotans proud. We don't buy our t**les so there are summers that we stink. These are grown men. These are heroes. Please don't call them Twinkies.
In the fall of 87 I was pretty much in heaven. I got my license and a girlfriend and the Twins had won the pennant. I prayed more in the Dome than I ever did at church. Kirby Puckett had the smile; Kent Hrbek had the smirk. First we tamed the Tigers, then we were dealt the Cards, and they came to the Twin Cities to try to make sense of our park. It was loud, and it was close, and it went to seven games. But the Twins took home the t**le and that sweet music played.
From Edina to Duluth, from the south side to downtown, the Minnesota Twins are making Minnesotans proud. So hey, let's make some noise. C'mon, wave those Homer Hankies. These are grown men. These are heroes. Please don't call them Twinkies.

In 1991 the Twins were once again on top. We faced Atlanta in the Series. They thought that they were hot. I've never seen nothing so lame as that Fondahawk chop. But we were up against the ropes when Kirby called his shot. And as he ran around the bases, smiling and pumping fists, we all knew that he had won it, though it was only just game six. And the next night Jack Morris came and made his hometown proud. You should watch it in slow motion: Ron Gant was clearly out.

From Mankato up to Brainerd, from Burnsville to Bemidji. Now we're playing outdoor baseball and that's the way it should be. Raise a toast to Kirby Puckett, raise another to Tom Kelly. These are Minnesota Twins. So please don't call them Twinkies. We've got Justin, we've got Joe. That's enough reason to party.
We don't buy our t**les and we've still won two World Series. Grab yourself a 3.2 beer and raise a toast to Gardy. These are the Minnesota Twins. So please don't call them Twinkies.
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Volume 2: High and Inside (2011)