Some mates and I in a public house
Were playing dominoes last night night
when all of a sudden in the pub man came
with His face all a chalky white.
"What's up", says Brown, "Have you seen a ghost,
"Have you seen your Aunt Mariah?"
"Me Aunt Mariah be blowed!", says he,
"The bloomin' pub's on fire!"
chorus
And there was Brown upside down
knockin back the whiskey on the floor.
"Booze, booze!" The firemen cried
As they came knockin' on the door (clap clap)
Oh don't let 'em in till it's all mopped up
And somebody shouted MacIntyre! MACINTYRE!
And we all got blue-blind paralytic drunk
When the Old Dun Cow caught fire.
Oh Johnson rushed to the port wine tub
And gave it just a few hard knocks (clap clap)
Started takin' off his pantaloons
Likewise his shoes and socks.
"Hold on, " says Dix, "if you want to wash your feets
theres a tub of old ale here
Don't wash you feet in the port wine tub
when we've still got some old stale beer".
chorus
just then there came a mighty crash
Half the b***** roof caved away.
We were all dossed with the firemen's hose
But still we were all gay.
So we got some sacks and some old tin tacks
And bunged ourselves inside
And we sat drinking good old scotch
Till we were bleary-eyed.
chorus
Were playing dominoes last night night
when all of a sudden in the pub man came
with His face all a chalky white.
"What's up", says Brown, "Have you seen a ghost,
"Have you seen your Aunt Mariah?"
"Me Aunt Mariah be blowed!", says he,
"The bloomin' pub's on fire!"
chorus
And there was Brown upside down
knockin back the whiskey on the floor.
"Booze, booze!" The firemen cried
As they came knockin' on the door (clap clap)
Oh don't let 'em in till it's all mopped up
And somebody shouted MacIntyre! MACINTYRE!
And we all got blue-blind paralytic drunk
When the Old Dun Cow caught fire.
Oh Johnson rushed to the port wine tub
And gave it just a few hard knocks (clap clap)
Started takin' off his pantaloons
Likewise his shoes and socks.
"Hold on, " says Dix, "if you want to wash your feets
theres a tub of old ale here
Don't wash you feet in the port wine tub
when we've still got some old stale beer".
chorus
just then there came a mighty crash
Half the b***** roof caved away.
We were all dossed with the firemen's hose
But still we were all gay.
So we got some sacks and some old tin tacks
And bunged ourselves inside
And we sat drinking good old scotch
Till we were bleary-eyed.
chorus