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He Shouldn't-A, Oughtn't-A Swang on Me! Lyrics

He sleeps out there, out where the coyotes wail
The reason he aint at the bar with the boys
Makes quite a dismal tale ...
He shouldnt-a, hadnt-a, oughtnt-a swang on me
He oughtnt-a, shouldnt-a, hadnt-a, no, siree
You dont get many callers
Sleeping on the lone prairie
But he shouldnt-a, hadnt-a, oughtnt-a swang on me.

Way out West we're wild and wooly,
in order to explain it fully:
We're tall grown, all grown,
All the men are hairy-chested
And all the women, double-breasted
We're lady-like until molested,
And then we're on our own!

He shouldnt-a, hadnt-a, oughtnt-a swang on me.
He oughtn't-a shouldn't-a hadn't-a felt so free,
His wife gets the the insurance,
And I'm sorry as can be,
But he shouldnt-a, hadnt-a, oughtnt-a swang on me.

This here job is mighty tryin',
at times the room gits fairly flyin'
With high-b****, eye-b****;
One got killed, somebody got 'im,
tore up the joint from top to bottom
I think I was the one that shot 'im
as near as I recall.
He shouldnt-a, hadnt-a, oughtnt-a swang on me.
He massacred eight or nine minutes, the lazy "b"!
He then took on the sheriff, and the sheriff's deputy,
But he shouldnt-a, hadnt-a, oughtnt-a swang on me.

All you boys remember Harry
The wrangler I was set to marry
A long man, strong man
One night he yells "Im from Texas! ...
And socks me in my solar plexus.
Well having normal, good reflexes,
I knocked him on his can!
He shouldnt-a, hadnt-a, oughtnt-a blacked my eye.
Im really a lovable, peaceable kind of guy.
I wouldnt scare a rabbit and I couldnt harm a flea,
But he shouldnt-a, hadnt-a, oughtnt-a swang on me.

If this story has a moral,
It's: When youre looking for a quarrel or
show down; Slow down.
If by now, you havent mastered
The gentle art of getting plastered,
You're just a Low-Down, you ain't mastered
The motto of our town!

You shouldnt-a, hadnt-a, oughtnt-a start no fight
Our burying grounds are a most impressive sight!
The message on them tombstones is as simple as can be:
He shouldnt-a, hadnt-a, oughtnt-a swang on me
He shouldnt-a, hadnt-a, oughtnt-a swang on me.
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