The c***roach That Ate Cincinnati Lyrics

Ah-ah Don't touch that dial!

I must offer to you a confession
I like movies that give me a fright (AAAAAAAAAA!!!!)
If the subject is horror
I've got to see more or
I won't be contented all night
You may call it my ghoulish obsession
It's a subject on which I get chatty
But the worst one it seems
Haunting all of my dreams
Was the c***roach that ate Cincinnati

I've seen ghouls and hobgoblins and witches
And some moth-eaten werewolves with fangs (owooo!)
There were creatures that chattered
And others that clattered
And Japanese monsters with bangs (Ha-so!)
Frankenstein gives me the shakes
And Count Dracula's driving me batty
But they're not on a par
with the worst one by far
The c***roach that ate Cincinnati

Oh he must have needed a seltzer
It's amazing how much he got down
For lunch he'd just chew
up a suburb or two
And for dinner he at the whole town (burp!)
Willard just sent me out laughing
I thought Ben looked a little bit ratty
But they're not half as bad
As the worst scare I've had
"The c***roach That Ate Cincinnati"

Oh my heart nearly stopped
He will never be topped
The c***roach that ate Cincinnati... Olè!
(Olè? That's dumb!)