Hitching a Ride Lyrics

Hey mister, where you headed
Are you in a hurry
I need a lift to happy hour
Say oh no
Do you break for distilled spirits
I need a break as well
The well that inebriates the guilt
One, two, one, two, three, four
Cold turkey's getting stale
Tonight I'm eating crow
Fermented salmonella
Poison oak no
There's a drought a the fountain of youth
Now I'm dehydrating
My tongue is swelling up
I say one, two, one, two, three, four
(Chorus)
Troubled times
You know I cannot lie
I'm off the wagon and I'm hitching a ride

There's a drought at the fountain of youth
Now I'm dehydrating
My tongue is swelling up
I say...........s****!!!