Aussie Bar-B-Q Lyrics

When the summer sun is shining on Australia's happy land
Round countless fires in strange attire you'll see many happy bands
Of glum Australians watching their lunch go up in flames
By the smoke and the smell you can plainly tell it's barby-time again!
When the steaks are burning fiercely when the smoke gets in your eyes
When the snags all taste like fried toothpaste and your mouth is full of flies
It's a national institution; it's Australian through and through
So come on mate and grab your plate, let's have a bar-b-que!
The Scots eat lots of haggis; the French eat snails and frogs
The Greeks go crackers over their mousakkas, the Chinese love hot dogs
Welshmen love to have a leek, the Irish like their stew
But you just can't beat that half-cooked meat at an Aussie bar-b-que!

There's flies stuck to the margarine, the bread has gone rock hard
The kids are fighting, the mossies are biting "Who forgot the Aeroguard?!"
There's bull ants in the esky and the beer is running out
And what you saw in mum's coleslaw you just don't think about!
And when the barbie's over and your homeward way you wend
With a queasy tummy on the family dunny many lonely hours you spend
You might find yourself reflecting as many often do
Come rain or shine that's the b***** last time that you'll have a bar-b-que
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